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I CAN'T FKN SLEEP!!!

Writer's picture: divawdepdivawdep

11:00pm:


This is how it all begins. Usually I’m at least 24 hours into an episode of insomnia. My eyeballs are seeing eyeballs. I can’t sit up. The TV is just an object. So I get excited. Put on my favorite tshirt. Crawl under the covers. Turn the lights off. And:


2am:

Is that a new speck on the ceiling? I wonder why they call it a popcorn ceiling? When I was six I made a horrible mistake. I wonder what the kids did tonight. I’m going to turn to my left side. That’ll help me fall asleep.


4AM:


If she snapped, the ID channel, it must have been his fault. Oh shit, I didn’t pay my, insert bill. I haven’t spoken to, insert person who I never speak to. I took that sedative. Why aren’t I sleeping?! If I wasn’t such a depressed loser, I’d be sleeping. Only losers and weak people suffer from depression and insomnia. I’m going to turn the air on. I sleep when it’s cold.


5:30AM:


Hears stomping- guess the guy upstairs is getting ready for work now. Do I have any appointments today? I really need to get my life together. I’m going to work on my business today. I don’t think I’m good at it though. Look at my strong successful friends. I don’t have what they have. I’ll probably stay broke forever. Loser. Wonder what I’ll have for lunch. Wonder if I’ll leave the house today. It’s been a week. I wonder why that man killed his wife.(an article I read 2 days ago.)


6:25AM:

My eyes are closing. *yawn* Here comes sleep. Ahh…… What’s that noise?! Insert- horns blowing, dogs barking, sun rising.



6:30AM:


Guess I’ll get up and have some tea. Let’s see what the news is saying.


I’ll sleep when I’m dead. Isn’t that the saying?



Sipping tea- “Dead is looking real good right about now…”


Check out my new episode:

I Can't Fkn Sleep!

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